How To Kill Plants

Words by
Georgina Reid
Illustration by
Kit Bylett
| November 1, 2013

Not everyone is interested in hunting plants because they love them. Some may be interested in hunting to kill. Thats fine. Each to their own etcetera. So, in accordance with the topic of death, here is The Planthunter’s sure-fire guide to killing plants…

Glug. Glug. Glug.

Mmmmm. Delicious AND deadly!

Get steamy with your cactus….

Human induced climate change (on a very small scale!)

Apparently you’ve gotta be cruel to be kind? Just be cruel to be cruel.

Once you’ve killed all your plants, go to your local $2 shop and splash out on some plastic flowers and vines. Take your new, low maintenance garden home in a couple of plastic bags, stick them to your walls with masking tape and voila! A garden overflowing with un-fussy, green, and of course, extremely beautiful plants. What more could a modern plant hunter want?


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