Practical Tips For Outdoor Sexy Times

Words by
Georgina Reid
Illustration by
Michael Hili
| August 14, 2015

Getting it on outdoors in real life doesn’t always end up as triumphantly as it seems to in the movies. Think small bitey creatures, stinging nettles, and sand in all the wrong places. Hmm. A bit of a turn off, huh? Thanks to the generous bunch of Planthunter readers who shared their experiences with us in our Desire Survey, we’ve got a bunch of tried and tested ways of keeping your next outdoor loving adventures as triumphant as they come.

Practical Tips

‘Be spontaneous, don’t worry about getting dirty… It’s worth it. Use the natural surroundings as props :)’

‘Shade is important, a blanket is very useful to put down on the ground, watch out for ants and try to avoid laying in that tempting bed of clover – the bees love it!’

‘Make sure your father-in-law doesn’t catch you out at the waterhole (yep, that really happened).’

‘Look out for anthills… a sarong is perfect quick on ‘n off gear + something to lie on.’

‘Avoid the beach. Sand is no fun in the nether regions.’

‘Think about your knees, grass burn hurts! And watch out for ants.’

‘Go camping! Expose yourself to the elements and embrace the beauty of life in nature that is so often overlooked.’

‘Take a bottle of water. Enjoy the reality of being in nature. You know, sand, rocks, twigs, the possibility that a wild animal or stray nature lover may discover you!’

‘Know your poisonous plants and wear easy access clothes.’

‘Romance, Romance, preparation. Lubrication.’

‘Relax and give over some of the anxiety of modern life, like people and noise, and enjoy the natural rhythm of wind, bird call, light and landscape.’

‘I know it’s irresponsible to suggest a little glass of wine or three, but alcohol can help ;)’

‘Don’t have sex in the ocean – the salt water kinda stings the internal lady bits.’

‘Avoid nettles, ants nests and buried barbed wire at all costs.’

‘Don’t think too much.’

‘Wear a skirt when in a public place. Beware of tick habitat.’

‘Wear a dress so you can stand up quickly and act like nothing ever happened.’

‘Keep some clothes on, it could get very embarrassing very quickly.’

Plants to be Near

‘Anything that flowers or fruits, a post coital snack never tasted so sweet.’

‘Clover- cool and soft.’

Fragrant flowers are lovely, thyme makes a soft bed for love making.’

‘Gardenias or Murrayas when in flower, for their intoxicating scent.’

‘Philodendrons!’

‘Sand dunes behind the beach often have great tussock grasses that act as a soft bed.’

‘Wild roses would be ideal. Tree canopies are the best to look at while on back as well as your lover’s gaze.’

‘Deciduous trees in autumn.’

‘Frangipani, gardenia, night blooming jasmine.’

‘Palms and ferns – it’s an Eden thing.’

‘A smooth barked tree can be great support…’

‘Willow trees, jasmine, long native grasses, jonquils & salvia.’

‘Native Australian river mint. Mmmmm. There’s just something about arriving at your camp spot for the night after a long drive, opening a beer, looking at the stars, and taking in the quiet and scent of riverside plants…’

Plants to AVOID!

‘Scratchy grass or prickles in your knickers.’

‘Devils club, anything that attracts a lot of bees and insects.’

‘Definitely stinging nettle and farmer’s friends.

‘Opuntia microdasys.’

‘For me, ferns, cause I’m allergic. And of course poison ivy, poison oak and poodle dog bush. Oh and of course cacti, ouch!!’

‘Poison ivy, oak, and sumac.’

‘Cactus and ivy, for obvious reasons. Daisies because they smell bad.’

‘Prickly plants, and those attracting ants and bees… Identifying these in the heat of the moment is a skill!’

‘Anything with an ouch factor: stinging nettle, blackberries, bindies in the lawn.’

‘Blackberry bushes, rose bushes, anything with thorns.’


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